Saturday, May 29, 2010

Never Say Never

In 2000, Mike and I sold our “starter” home. We had lived there for fifteen years. Both our children were born while we lived there. They celebrated their first Christmases, first birthdays, first days of school, first broken bones chicken pox, and all the other firsts that occur in the early years of a child’s life while living there. In 2000, we decided that it was time to move to a bigger home. We designed and built a house out in the country. At the point we moved in, I vowed that I would never move again. As the child of a Navy officer I had moved enough times in my life and this new house, in my mind, was my dream house. I couldn’t think of any reason that another move would ever be necessary. What I have learned since making that pronouncement is to never say never.

Much has changed in my life in the ten years since we moved to the country. Both girls finished their last days of high school. I have packed both of their last school lunches. One has left for college and the other is leaving in a few months. Mike and I have divorced and Weber and I are about to be married. Right now we are all living together still in the house we built. For many good reasons, that too is about to change.

Mike is working primarily out of the country. Offspring No. 1 is in Chicago. Offspring No. 2 is about to leave for Tennessee, and Weber and I don’t need all this space for only the two us, or do we have the time to care for it. We weighed all of our options, which were many, and decided that the reasonable thing for us to do was to move back into his house in Dallas.

Living out here in the country, we spend between two and three hours every day commuting back and forth to school. Once we move, I can literally walk to school and his “commute” is six miles. We will be ten minutes rather than an hour from church. And as we have built our own circle of friends, we have come to realize that most of them live in Dallas. In an effort to be good stewards of our time and the environment as well as to be fiscally responsible, we have made the right decision for us at this time. As we prepare for this move, which I am quite excited about, I will not say that I will never move again. Though if I do, I hope it is no time soon!

Before we can move, we have to complete some major renovation and remodeling.. I feel the same level of excitement about this process as I did when Mike and I built our house. Though literally Weber and I are not starting from scratch, for all practical purposes we are. He has lived in this house since he was six years old. Its walls witnessed many first and lasts for him, both from childhood and adulthood. The process in which we find ourselves right now involves a fine balance of preserving those memories as well as creating something new to serve as a container for the memories that we will create together. So far it has been a fantastic journey.

We are having fun choosing appliances, countertops, flooring, paint colors, doors, windows, sinks, faucets, and the list goes on. Someone said to me the other day that going through this remodeling together may be the best form of marriage counseling there is. In their opinion, if we can survive this, we can survive anything. As of yet, we have had no major disagreements on anything. We both agree that the answer to most questions is “blue.” Well okay. I must confess that there has been one thing that we have not seen exactly eye to eye on. I said, and am unwilling to compromise, that the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling in the master bedroom had to go. They have, but I am not convinced that our contractor doesn’t have them tucked away safely somewhere just waiting for the right place for them to reappear! Maybe in the garage would be okay.

Weber has been documenting the whole demolition, renovation, remodeling, and rebuilding process on his website. I will try to get him to share his thoughts and his website chronicling what happens when am old house becomes a new home.

For now I am off to consider whether I would prefer the garbage disposal in the left sink or the right and do I need/want convection baking in both ovens.